Sitting in a room full of faces
Deafening silence screaming
as their laughter
spills onto the floor.
Watching the charades continue.
No one guessing, caring.
For a moment
when’s it my turn
I wrote this poem after a conversation with a friend. Her words burned as she expressed how she never felt accepted when she went to church. As my mind replayed our conversation, I found myself sitting in a room feeling what she felt and realized, it was a familiar feeling. The questions washed over me, “Who else feels this way? Why of all places would anyone feel alone in a place of worship? Why did I sometimes feel like I didn’t belong” Solutions finally began to flow dismissing my frustration. Selfishly perhaps; I decided to be one of the last to enter the church classroom. This way I could choose to sit next to anyone sitting by themselves. This kept me from feeling alone and helped me feel I was doing one small thing to keep someone else from feeling the same. A simple lesson that has broadcast itself many times in my life; when we choose to serve others, our needs are met.
The picture posted above is of a young girl who was an alternate color-guard member for my sons marching band. I watched in amazement as she tirelessly rehearsed from the sidelines, I found myself inspired as her efforts seemed constant. In contrast I saw other alternate band members who chose to simply watch from the sidelines discouraged and powerless as they waited for someone else to change their fate. I chose to illustrate their attitude the picture below. This young girl did not yet “belong” to the team, but she was doing everything in her realm of influence to prepare herself for that opportunity.I learned a lot from this young lady. Her resilient spirit was a powerful reminder to me that I have the power to choose how I feel and respond to any of life’s challenges; even if it’s just choosing to enter a room last.